A priest who participated in Princess Diana’s funeral and once delivered a sermon to Prince Harry during his time at Eton has publicly encouraged the Duke of Sussex to relinquish what she describes as a “victim mentality.”
She also cautioned that his ongoing behavior may be contributing to the distance between him and his family.
Angela Tilby, Canon Emeritus of Christ Church Cathedral in Oxford and Honorary Chaplain at Portsmouth Cathedral, shared her views in an article for Church Times, titled “A Sermon That Prince Harry Should Heed.”
Reflecting on her past connection to the prince, she wrote: “I mourn the loss of the red-haired teenager I once preached to. I believe he is a good man, but he has yet to find a way to silence the trauma that continues to affect him.”
Tilby, who was invited to preach at Eton in 2002, expressed her belief that Harry may have learned during chapel services that true forgiveness involves more than just reconciling with those who have caused harm—it also requires relinquishing the identity of being a victim, a process that she described as more painful but ultimately more necessary.
According to a report in the Daily Mail, she criticized Harry’s recent media comments, particularly his interview with the BBC in the U.S. after he lost a legal appeal concerning his security arrangements in the UK.
During the interview, the Duke claimed his father refuses to communicate with him and expressed uncertainty about how much time they may have left together.
Tilby compared Harry’s insistence on receiving police protection and his claim that the King could resolve the matter to the behavior of a boy still coping with the trauma of walking behind his mother’s coffin at the age of 12. She argued that some of Harry’s expectations reflect unresolved pain from his childhood.
However, Tilby also acknowledged that Harry and his wife, Meghan, have faced excessive and unkind criticism. She described the public backlash as “vulgar and cruel,” and noted that Harry now feels more secure living in California and sees little chance of ever feeling safe enough to return to the UK with his family.
Following his legal defeat, in which he sought taxpayer-funded protection while in the UK, Harry told the BBC he was concerned about history repeating itself. He claimed that evidence from the legal proceedings revealed that some individuals might be hoping for such an outcome, which he found disturbing.
The Court of Appeal, however, ruled against him. Senior judges Sir Geoffrey Vos, Lord Justice Bean, and Lord Justice Edis dismissed his appeal. Sir Geoffrey noted that although Harry’s personal grievances were “powerful and moving,” they did not present sufficient legal grounds to challenge the decision made by the Royal and VIP Executive Committee (Ravec).
Meanwhile, the Home Office defended its security procedures, calling them “thorough and appropriate.” Buckingham Palace responded firmly to Harry’s remarks, stating: “These matters have been thoroughly and repeatedly reviewed by the courts, with consistent conclusions each time.”
